It’s a quiet thing, a word found in the stillness of dawn while dreamers slumber and the new moon succumbs to day. A fading thought, soft intake of breath in the long pause
between sleep and wake. Sometimes it’s hope enduring wildfire, flood, or the dusts of time. Maybe dinosaur bones, a lost tomb, or scarecrows guarding lavender fields.
Perhaps a dew-drizzled cobweb, a jonquil, cloud or song. Most often it’s your breath, soft and steady, promising one more day in which I will belong.
Fifty soon. Strange how that number feels both heavier and lighter than expected.
I wake before the house stirs. Kettle on. Dogs at my heel— the old one careful on the tiles, the young one waiting for the day like it might break open just for her.
A magpie sings on the powerline, low and fluted— not calling, not warning— just there. Like me.
The track behind is long, marked with all the right things: mud, fire, boys with scraped knees and full bellies, a wife who still sees me when I go quiet.
The years haven’t made me wise, but they’ve made me slower to speak, and better at listening— especially to my sons, who keep handing me pieces of myself I didn’t know I’d dropped.
There is more life to come. I can feel it humming in the floorboards. Not louder— just steadier.
And if this is the halfway mark, it’s a fine place to pause. To stand with the sun not at my back or in my eyes, but warming my chest.
The magpie sings again. Not a beginning, not an ending— just the middle of a good song I still get to hear.